Thistle invites them in for tea, but it seems her hospitality hides something more sinister.
Sprickle-sprack has left the group at the entrance to Thistle’s home, and as time ticks on it occurs to Shepherd that his time is running out. He confesses to the group that he’s not really as he seems to be, and is worried he might not see Hunter before his time runs out.
As they walk closer, they hear a haunting melody being sung from within the hut. Shepherd and Rou sense danger and become wary, and the group agrees that caution is warranted when talking with Thistle. When Shepherd calls out for Hunter, an old woman’s voice responds and invites the group in for tea. As the group starts to ask questions about Hunter, it becomes obvious that Thistle is not one for niceties.
Follow Dax @GM_Dax, Kappa @TheKappaChris, Wren @ThornyDryad, and Gaynor @gaynorcott
Transcript by CJ Kallevig
Upbeat piano intro ends [00:28]
Gentle piano music fades in [00:30]
Wren (as Eight): Hello. I am Eight, and you are listening to Roads Uncharted. Previously on Roads Uncharted, my friend Rou and our new friend, Shepherd, had stumbled upon the meadow where we expected to find a missing Hunter. Instead of finding Hunter, we found traces and other elements that indicated our quarry had stepped through a quote “magic portal”. For those of you who may recall, in a past episode, Arthas and I, along with our good friend Theodore Lawrence Briggs, had found a magical rift in the woods together. As such, there was some worry about where this portal may wind up going and whether or not we would be able to return safely. As a group, we decided to test and see what would happen if something went through.
And by hucking an enormous stick through the rift, we were able to deduce that it would be safe for us to pass through as well. And so we did! Upon doing so, we met with a very small person named Sprickle-sprack, who was more interested in obtaining financial wealth, rather than helping others. It’s not a very good physical quality to possess. Regardless, we offered Sprickle-sprack wealth and Sprickle-sprack led us through a strange new wilderness where time seems to operate on an entirely different scale. Eventually we were directed towards a stand of trees, where we might find a person named Thistle, who is apparently entertaining our missing Hunter as well. And now you are brought back to speed. We will be able to see just what happens as we proceed to these trees.
Music shifts to a suspenseful tune [02:18]
Dax: So my question to you, dear players, is how quickly after Sprickle-sprack leaves do you head further towards the copse of trees?
Gaynor: I feel like Shepherd, I’m waiting to see what they, what the rest of the group wants to do, but I am anxiously, like, sort of doing little jumps and pacing, ready to go. Like I’m ready to sprint towards those trees. I don’t wanna move without my friends because I know that they, they have stopped me from making mistakes already. And so perhaps if this is one, I would like them to, to have the chance to stop me.
Dax: Okay.
Wren (as Eight): If we would like to proceed with haste, I will not stop us. I’ll just follow along.
Kappa: Yeah. Rou will, will definitely clock that, I think, and just,
Kappa (as Rou): Well, if we want to stay on the timetable, correct? Like, we want to arrive there by dawn, given the way time works here, we should leave as soon as possible to stay on the timeline that Sprickle-sprack gave us.
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Okay! Let’s go!
Gaynor: And Shepherd starts moving, I don’t think full running, but moving quickly through the, through towards the, towards the trees here.
Dax: Shepherd, I will say at this point, it’s your second night here. Things are starting to smell a lot sharper. You’re starting to notice things in sharper perspective.
Gaynor: I quickly turn back to the group and I say,
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Um, so, update, before we move. I have noticed that at night, when I wake up, some things change about me sometimes. You may notice that I am less of a person over time. I, I know I only have so much time before I am not this way anymore. So, I just don’t want you to be upset when, if something serious changes, but I, I do miss my tail. So maybe that’ll come back first.
Wren (as Eight): Oh, are you saying you’re slowly turning back to your former self?
Gaynor (as Shepherd): I, I think I’m just getting back to what I was? I just wanted to be able to see, see Hunter before I, I turn back. So, but, but the nights being so fast here, I think it’s moving. We’re gonna do more nights here than I had planned.
Wren (as Eight): Then I suppose that means we have to hurry.
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Yes.
Kappa (as Rou): It won’t happen by dawn, correct? Moving at this pace?
Gaynor (as Shepherd): I don’t think so.
Kappa (as Rou): Well then, at least you’ll have one, one morning, as short as it is, in this, in this area to express all the love that you have for Hunter.
Gaynor (as Shepherd): I hope so.
Gaynor: Question for the GM. I know we’ve kind of discussed that I know vaguely how much time I have left.
Dax: You’ve kind of figured it out, considering after the first few days you started to notice that you were reverting back. Like small hints of things. So.
Gaynor: And do I notice any physical changes at this time? Like, am I getting hairier? Do I have my tail back yet? [chuckles]
Dax: Not in that sense, no. Just the, the keener eyesight and the sharper sense of smell.
Gaynor: Just the feeling more, okay. Then I, as we’re walking, as we’re kind of moving, will say,
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Guys, if I don’t have time to say it later, um, thank you. Thank you for helping me get here. I haven’t met a lot of others and I’m glad that you were not… bears. You didn’t hurt me and you didn’t try to fight me, and you were helpful, like Hunter is. And I just, just want to thank you for that.
Kappa (as Rou): Well, you’re very welcome. And thank you for showing us kindness, showing us this. Shepherd, you might not know, but the world out there is very complicated. With you, things are simple and it’s very nice.
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Yeah, Hunter says that that’s why we live in the woods. Because it’s, it’s complicated and messy out there and, and Hunter says that there’s people out there who make things harder for people on purpose. And that’s no good. So I, so I try and make things as easy for everybody as I can! And, because that’s what Hunter says that we should do for everybody. We should always try and help each other and, and help others when we can, because that’s why we’re, that’s why we’re here. That has made me a little, a little afraid of outsiders. So I’m, I’m glad it didn’t go that way.
Dax: So I’m going to interject real quick, and say as you’ve been walking closer, and night has been passing. You start to see the first inklings of dawn. You start to hear, on the breeze, a very haunting melody being sung. You don’t recognize the words, in fact, in most cases you’re not really sure that you are hearing words. But the sound of it sends a shiver up your spine.
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Mh-mmm. This is no good. That, that sound is, something feels bad, not good. Mmn-mm. No, no.
Gaynor: I stand in front of my friends and try to smell on the wind, if I smell anything strange.
Dax: Give me a Survival check. Give it to me at Medium difficulty, so two purple please.
[dice rolls]
Gaynor: Two Successes.
Dax: So you’re not really sure what this smell is. But it kind of reminds you of the first time you went hunting bear with Hunter, and you could smell that whatever you were going to encounter was going to be a tough fight. You knew that it, something in your, the back of your brain is telling you that this is gonna be something that is going to be hard to handle but you don’t know what it is. So it, maybe it’s the fear of the unknown?
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Friends, there is something dangerous nearby. And I would suggest that we all stay close together and everybody be ready to, to do something about it.
Kappa (as Rou): I am also apprehensive with the amount of, with the singing that’s happening.
Kappa: Do I know, have I heard stories of like sirens and stuff?
Dax: You’ve heard fairytales of sirens, of creatures that lurk in the deep waters and convince mortals to come down into the depths. You’ve heard stories of all sorts of terrifying creatures that are rumored to be not exactly of the world in which you know.
Kappa: So, with that, I’m also sort of taking heed of this warning and being a little bit more apprehensive. Still approaching, I don’t know how to be more prepared than I am, other than trying to observe and try and catch anything that could be trying to catch us off guard. But approaching.
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Hunter always says that the most dangerous things were always going to catch you. So you always got to just face them head-on. So, so I guess we, I guess we keep going.
Wren (as Eight): Your Hunter sounds most wise, Shepherd. I look forward to meeting them.
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Yeah, you’re gonna, yeah, Hunter’s great. One time, we were going out and we were gonna go get fish, and I don’t do much with the fish. I just sit by the water and I wait. Then, he had a stick that he was using to get some fish and so then I went and I found a stick. He did a real laugh at that one. You’ll like him. He’s, he’s got a good laugh.
Kappa (as Rou): So we just go in. What’s the worst that can happen? [quick pause] Never mind, don’t answer that.
Wren (as Eight): Excellent.
Wren: As you were recounting your wonderful tale about your fishing experience, I will pop my spoon out of my wrist gauntlet, and beholding it, I’ll look to Rou and I’ll just give a serious, stony face to you.
Wren (as Eight): I will have this on hand in the off chance something untoward happens towards us.
Kappa (as Rou): That’s very smart. I hope we don’t need it, but it’s good to have just in case.
Kappa: I proceed forward.
Kappa (as Rou): Well, I’d like to avoid fighting as much as possible. But if it comes to that, we, I mean the, there are three of us, potentially four.
Dax: As dawn comes in full realization, you arrive at the copse of trees and you’re now close enough and it’s light enough for you to see that there is a hut in and amongst all these tall pines. It seems to have a moss-covered roof, you can see some smoke tendrils coming out of what might be a chimney. The singing is now louder.
Kappa: I’ll call out,
Kappa (as Rou): Hello! Hello, uh, we are, we are travelers looking for Thistle and a Hunter. I’m not sure if that’s Hunter’s real name, but we have Hunter’s friend with us who is very eager to see them. That is not being facetious, they are very eager.
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Hunter! Hunter! Hunter, can you hear me?
Dax: So with the first hello that you call out, Rou, the singing stops.
Kappa (as Rou): You have a lovely voice.
Dax: When you and Shepherd are done speaking, you hear from the hut,
Dax (as Thistle): [in an elderly, trembly femme voice] Oh, has someone come to see Granny Thistle? Why don’t you come in my dearies, and have a nice cup of tea?
Wren: I smile.
Wren (as Eight): I love tea! Perhaps this won’t be dangerous at all. [whispers] After all, she is of the older persuasion. Perhaps she is simply harmless.
Wren: And I will start walking forward.
Gaynor (as Shepherd): No, no, no, no.
Gaynor: I run up to Eight.
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Um, no, Eight, please. We should, um, maybe we should be careful cause sometimes -
Wren (as Eight): Oh, yes!
Wren: And I will interrupt you.
Wren (as Eight): I have not confirmed what type of tea there is. [slightly louder] Hello, yes! I would love some tea, depending on what type of tea you have!
Kappa (as Rou): And whether or not it’s poison!
Wren (as Eight): Yes, that is of concern to me. Feel free to poison my cup.
[Gaynor makes a whimpering sound]
Wren: And I’ll turn back.
Wren (as Eight): [whispers] I can detect poisons and protect the rest of you.
Kappa (as Rou): [mutters] I forgot about that.
Dax (as Thistle): That seems very, very concerning. Why would I want to poison guests? Please, come inside.
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Smells, smells like danger.
Kappa: I’ll look over at Shepherd.
Kappa (as Rou): Shepherd, danger is my middle name. We will take this head on.
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Your name is Rou Danger?
Kappa (as Rou): Rou Danger.
Wren (as Eight): Rou Danger. I was not aware that you were also collecting honorifics to go with your name. I’ll make a note of this. Rou Danger. Now that I think about it, I don’t actually know your last name, Rou.
Kappa (as Rou): I’ve, I’ve just always been called Rou.
Wren (as Eight): Hmmm.
Kappa (as Rou): I mean, Rou, Rou Danger.
Gaynor: Upon hearing this, I say,
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Yeah, my middle name, I think is goddamnit, cause Hunter will say, “Shepherd, goddamnit”.
[everyone laughs]
Wren (as Eight): Logically that makes sense.
Kappa (as Rou): We’re coming in.
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Mhmm.
Kappa: And we’ll start, start approaching.
Kappa (as Rou): I don’t want to see anything untoward! Just a nice, Granny Thistle.
Wren (as Eight): And a cup of warm tea!
Kappa (as Rou): And our friend’s friend!
Gaynor (as Shepherd): And no sharp teeth. Please.
Dax: So marching order. Who’s going in first, second, third?
Kappa: I’ll go first.
Wren: I will go second.
Dax: Okay.
Wren: Or at the very least, I’m walking very closely behind Rou if not like, side by side with him.
Dax: Alright.
Kappa: Yeah, I just, I mean it would be weird if, if I had said my name was Rou Danger and then didn’t go first. [laughs]
Gaynor: We’re all pushing each other to go first. [laughs]
Wren: No, me first. Me first!
Kappa: Move!
Wren: Tea, my friend! I’m dangerous!
Kappa: No, I’m the brave one! [laughs]
Dax: Yeah.
Gaynor: Yeah, I’m bringing up the rear, rather anxiously.
Dax: Alright, so as each of you in turn walk through the threshold of this hut, you are greeted by what looks to be, maybe a little ramshackle, home. But oddly enough, warm and cozy. There is a fire pit in one end where you can see this blazing fire. You can hear the clattering of the iron lid on this iron teapot, kettle, thing, as it’s, the water is heating over the fire. You can see, you know, a nice little table and chairs, there’s dried herbs hanging from the ceiling. You can smell something cooking in the oven, smells like [sniffs deeply] mmm, it smells like maybe chicken or maybe pork.
But it just, it just seems so nice and inviting and you walk in, and it’s very warm and cozy. Sitting at, well rather, sitting in a very worn looking rocking chair is what appears to be an older woman. She’s got very silvery hair up in this nice bun, she’s in very well worn clothes with a nice afghan shoulder wrap. She’s sitting there, knitting and rocking back and forth.
Dax (as Thistle): Well, hello. Please come inside.
Wren: Is she wearing like a burlap sack?
Dax: No?
Wren: Worn, well worn. Okay, I’m just imagining, like, brown tattered clothing with a nice shoulder shawl.
Dax: No, like hand knitted dress, you know, some, some worn leather boots. Just well loved clothing.
Wren: Hmm, okay. Yeah.
Gaynor: Is the smell of danger getting stronger? Like, is it strong now that we’re in here?
Dax: It permeates this whole hut.
Gaynor: I think under, just as we’re entering, Shepherd is just kind of like, just giving a low level like [growls].
Music shifts to a mysterious melody [19:25]
Dax (as Thistle): Do you have a cough dearie? I can put some honey and some ginger in your tea.
Dax: And Granny Thistle, as you can probably assume this person is, does stand up from the rocking chair and kind of shuffles over to the tea kettle and pulls it off the fire and starts making cups of tea. What do the three of you do?
Kappa: I will speak up.
Kappa (as Rou): Well, thank you for inviting us to your home. We are looking for a friend of ours, a Hunter. They had a ponytail, very kind eyes, clothes.
Kappa: I’m trying to recall any of the details that Shepherd has said.
Gaynor (as Shepherd): He has a, his beard and -
Kappa (as Rou): He has skin.
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Skin. Says a lot of nice things about people, maybe…
Kappa (as Rou): And uh -
Gaynor (as Shepherd): Has a, maybe talks about their best friend a lot? And how they miss them?
Kappa (as Rou): And we were referred in your direction from a passerby.
Wren (as Eight): Named Sprickle-sprack!
Dax: At the mention of Sprickle-sprack, anybody looking at Granny Thistle would clearly notice this like, weird expression cross her face. And it’s gone almost as fast as it arrived. She pauses in pouring the water for the tea and then continues to pour.
Dax (as Thistle): Ohhh. Oh is that so? Hmm. Oh, excuse me, must put some honey in my own. Um, alright. Well, here. Here dear, take some tea.
Dax: She pushes the cups forward.
Dax (as Thistle): Now I don’t know if I’ve ever seen anyone that matches that description. I, you see Granny Thistle is here all alone and has for many, many years.
Kappa: Do I believe her?
Dax: I don’t know Rou, do you?
Kappa: Is there, does she, is there any indication other than that like, that weird look that she might be trying to deceive us? That I can pick up on.
Dax: If you’re trying to see what you notice, go ahead and give me a Perception check. Give it to me at Easy difficulty. So one purple, and you do get a Boost because of Eight being so close.
Wren: Double Boost.
Gaynor: Two Boost.
Dax: Oh yeah, because you are very very close, yeah.
Gaynor: Cause I’m, cause I also have it.
Wren: Oh you do? Then you’re going to get four Boosts.
Kappa: Okay. [dice rolls] Five Advantages, two Successes. Danger Rou strikes again.
Dax: Your bullshit-o-meter is, is going off the charts with this. What would you like to use those Advantages for?
Kappa: What I want to do is ask her a few questions and get her to trip up on, like have her trip up on, on some of them to, you know, really put her in a place, in a position of like ‘oh shit they know’.
Dax: Okay. So you want to try and, you want to use the Advantage to learn the goal and basically kind of reveal what she’s -
Kappa: Yeah.
Dax: Okay. Yeah, I’ll say you can definitely -
Kappa: Yeah, what’s, what’s Granny Thistle’s deal? What’s the Thistle deal?
Dax: Sure. So I’ll say that’ll be, that will go off no problem. Let’s, let’s go through this narratively, so why don’t you start asking, hit me with it, Rou.
Kappa: Sure.
Kappa (as Rou): We were referred to you here by Sprickle-sprack, but Sprickle-sprack said that before leaving us, said that not everything is as it seems. What, what does that, what does that mean, Granny Thistle?
Dax (as Thistle): Oh, well you know Gnomes, they’re not quite the most truthful creatures in the realm.
Kappa (as Rou): Did you make the portals?
Kappa: I’minterrupting her.
Kappa (as Rou): Did you make the portal that brought us here?
Dax (as Thistle): No, no. I don’t deal with those kinds of magics, dearie. Just simple herbs and medicines -
Kappa (as Rou): Why would Sprickle-sprack bring us to you, saying that you have Hunter, but there is no Hunter around?
Dax (as Thistle): Have you ever met a Gnome dear?
Kappa (as Rou): Why are you so cool about us mentioning poison?
Wren (as Eight): Why would you make such broad sweeping generalizations about Gnomes? Also, why aren’t you concerned about the fact that someone talked about portals, which are a thing that only advanced scholars would know about? Also, you mentioned magic. No one said anything about magic.
Kappa (as Rou): Where is the bathroom here?
Gaynor (as Shepherd): And, and why do you smell like a bear?
Kappa (as Rou): Why do you smell like a bear?
Wren (as Eight): And also, what’s in this tea? [slurps]
Dax: So I will say, as each question starts to come faster and faster and the three of you are kind of piling on Granny Thistle and she’s getting less and less of an opportunity to talk. You start to notice that she is appearing very frustrated. It’s getting harder and harder for her to pretend like she’s really interested in the social niceties.
It is at that point where you slurp the tea that she slams her hands down on the table and she looks at the three of you. You start to notice that this really blackish purple kind of mist starts to form around Granny Thistle and encases her entire body. Her hair starts to come undone from that silvery bun and starts to weave out from her head as if it was standing on static electricity. And that is where we are going to end this session.
Kappa: Oooooh!
Music fades out [25:09]
Dax: Thanks for listening! We hope you’ll join us next time but in the interim, follow us on Twitter @RoadsUncharted.
The “Roads Uncharted” podcast is GMed and produced by Dax who you can find on Twitter @GM_Dax. We use the Genesys RPG System published by Fantasy Flight Games and music licensed by Epidemic Sound.
Eight is played by Wren, who also composed the music for our opening theme. Follow them on Twitter @ThornyDryad.
Rou is played by Kappa, and you can follow him on Twitter @TheKappaChris.
Arthas, Champion of Offam is played by Neil.
Shepherd has been played by our guest, Gaynor. You can follow them on Twitter @gaynorcott.